i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
a search helicopter?!
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
