Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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