I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
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