i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize
