Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
