i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
