You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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