There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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