I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
