doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
