I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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