I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize