You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Randomize
