I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
