we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
