that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
