You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
