when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
