I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
