Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Randomize
