So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Me too!
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
