Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
should my penis look like a turkey
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
