It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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