Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize