I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
