Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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