Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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