so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
