the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
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