I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
