Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
