Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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