She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
