I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
