Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
