I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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