I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
