Heybabeimwearingurpanties
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
