was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
