We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
