She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
