I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
