Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
