i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
