No, you can still breathe under the balls.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
