By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
