That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize