his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Randomize
