Quick, to the slutcave!
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
