Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
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