Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Randomize
