so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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